JN: Alright, let's do some talking!
MFF: Appreciate the enthusiasm. The Phillies have a strong lineup. What's your plan of attack?
JN: Sure, they've got thunder. But you know what comes before thunder? Little particles forming clouds, and then a lot of messed up sh** with electrons. Then lightning, then thunder. What I need to do is disrupt the process before it gets that far.
MFF: Chase Utley recently called you a sparrow. How do you respond?
JN: I'm no sparrow!
MFF: What's the best part about being a Met?
JN: Being in New York, living in the house with everyone, it's all just real exciting. [While saying these words, Niese was pointing enthusiastically to the young coconut in his hand, then rubbing his belly in a display of satisfaction.]
MFF: Describe Jon Niese in three words.
JN: Vicious, viscous, sparrow... NO!
MFF: Thanks for your time Jon, good luck tonight.
JN: Wait, who did you say you were?
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